The first crack in the glass.

Dearest reader,

I'm sure we're all reeling from the goddess herself, Taylor Swift, whose new album was recently released and is marking a page turner for the 2020's. It's based on freedom, moving on, and finally letting go, a definitive difference from her 2012 Original Red heartbreak track.

As I listen All too well (The 10 minute version, of course) while writing this I realized that a lot of us had our Red phases, I certainly did. And more of us have gone through breakups, heartbreak, a shattering eclipse of never-ending hurt than I probably know. And how we wish we could have seen the signs. I mean, they were probably right in front of us, weren't they?

The first crack in the glass resembles, at least for me, the slip of a relationship. It's like riding to the top of a mountain and starting to feel your weight slipping as you realize you're about to tumble down, face first into the mud. And that moment when you see the glass crack, when you see the person you're supposed to be in love with show a side of themselves they've hidden so well from the world you could barely notice it, that's when everything starts going downhill.

For me, I knew the very moment it happened that it couldn't be fixed. It's not just a fight, or an argument. It's when he yells and says something you never thought he'd be capable of, because how can something so bad come out of such a beautiful mouth? So, you dismiss it, you forgive him after he gives a half-ass apology and lets him take you out for ice cream and you move on, but there's this small pit in your stomach that just grows day by day.

And every day you grow a little bit further apart. Because the guy you're sleeping next to under silk covers, the one you're kissing late at night in your car and the one that you were absolutely madly in love with, is not the same person you knew those last few months of your relationship. Sure, he looked like him, he smiled the same way and had the same pair of sparkly blue eyes, his hair still shined in the sunlight and his teeth were still pearly white - but everything seemed darker, and different. And then the fighting starts. The annoyance, the rejected phone calls and the miscommunication. At that point your relationship was dead even before it was over.

I think the worst part is that we're so fixated on saving something that can't be saved, that we damage ourselves in the process. Take it from me - relationships end, people move on and hearts heal much faster than you think. And when the thoughts of them pop up randomly unannounced, supercuts of them singing and laughing, waking you up in the morning and making you dinner - you learn to smile at the memories, because you remember them all too well.

Kisses,

The relationship expert.